Joyce’s parmesan waft trumps Goyder’s humility cologne

On Tuesday, Goyder swiftly shifted gears towards enhancing his reputation, highlighting his achievements in reviving Coles during his tenure as CEO of Wesfarmers. At the time, Coles and Woolworths were widely disliked, earning the title of "the two most despised companies in Australia."

"I'll begin tackling these tasks, and we'll proceed with the necessary steps. I believe that my contribution to this endeavor is quite significant."

Here's a new version of the blog section: Introducing a small announcement called: kindly retain my services. Uncle Rich possesses the expertise to handle such challenges, you know? He's the expert in transforming situations. He's nearly irreplaceable. "I may have let this chaotic situation spiral out of hand, but now you require me because I bring a sense of humbleness." With just a quick search in his grooming supplies, he can retrieve the bottle of humility cologne he saved specifically for this moment. A few sprays and everything will be rectified.

However, Qantas finds itself in a severe predicament at present solely due to Goyder's complete inability to take charge and carry out the necessary actions.

Coles serves as a perfect comparison. Goyder made a significant overpayment for the supermarket giant in 2007, and Wesfarmers' profitability never fully recovered. It's evident that the price was excessively high when even Solomon Lew is eager to sell. Following the collapse of Wesfarmers' stock during the Global Financial Crisis, Goyder had to secure additional funds by offering shares, which disadvantaged retail shareholders who were unable to contribute their share. This drastic measure was necessary to keep the company functioning.

Indeed, it is a fact that Coles experienced a severe loss of trust from its clientele during the leadership of chairman Rick Allert and CEO John Fletcher (who, upon his arrival at Coles, confessed to not having visited a supermarket in 25 years). However, it was not Goyder who successfully transformed Coles. The credit goes to Ian McLeod, a skilled and accomplished player in the United Kingdom's grocery industry. As for Goyder, did he request Allert, the chairman responsible for overseeing Coles' decline, to remain and provide lessons on humility? That question is simply foolish.

One of the notable things that Goyder accomplished during his time leading Coles was the introduction of a policy in their pubs located in Queensland. This policy allowed children to be present in the areas where poker machines were situated, and these establishments would entice gamblers to play these machines by promoting their free kids' clubs to the public.

Back in 2009, Paul Bendat, an advocate against pokies, decided to place a big advertisement in the local newspaper called the Cambridge Post, which serves the peaceful neighborhood of Peppermint Grove in Goyder. The ad featured a picture of Goyder along with the attention-grabbing title, "Do you recognize this individual?" Coles, the grocery store chain, quickly made significant changes to their procedures shortly after.

In July 2009, there was a large advertisement taking up an entire page in the Cambridge Post, which is the local newspaper for Richard Goyder's neighborhood of Peppermint Grove in Perth.

Bendat grasped entirely the core concern for Richard Goyder, which is the legendary persona of Richard Goyder, the competent and affable individual. No alterations have occurred. He thrives in an elevated position. He is essentially the overseer of the Chairman's Lounge, the utmost authority within Australia's influential circles. He holds the highest authority within the AFL. He presides over Woodside as its chairman, essentially paralleling a notable figure in Western Australia.

And who is he, actually? He is a person that can embody any man for anyone, whoever you desire him to be. He's typically composed and calm, but he clearly appears agitated now that he's promoting his credentials for a successful change.

Goyder has kept us in the dark about the very information we're all eager to find out, namely the amount he used from shareholders' funds to facilitate Alan's sudden departure. Keep in mind, the most effective falsehoods often involve leaving out crucial details. The board's silence regarding Joyce's bonuses is solely based on their fear of causing an uproar if they were to reveal their actions.

We'll discover the results of Joyce's bonus when Qantas presents its yearly report in the following weeks, most likely on a Friday night at 7pm. Perhaps, Uncle Rich will have to reschedule the AFL grand final a bit earlier to divert attention from the event.

Joyce has experienced various highs and lows, spanning over a period of 22 years. Presently, he is progressing forward in order to benefit Qantas to the fullest extent - this truly embodies Alan's character! However, what are the potential consequences of his actions? Is there a hidden catch?

We are aware of the cost that shareholders will bear: a whopping $15 billion of postponed investment in the fleet commencing in the present year. Additionally, we are aware of ACCC chair Gina Cass-Gottlieb's demand for a minimum of $250 million; a hypothetical penalty which is merely twice the amount that shareholders have shelled out to this individual over a span of 15 years. To make matters worse, the price includes the unsettling combination of outdated and subpar airplanes still in operation, the substantial expense of replacing them, and the intensified political examination resulting in heightened competition.

Cass-Gottlieb shocked Joyce directly on her forehead using her electric weapon on Thursday, and since then, he's been unsteady and disoriented in the dangerous enclosure. This is the usual course of events before someone's life is unjustly taken away. However, despite his weakened condition, he would have still been trying to strike a deal. In Alan's reality, everything revolves around exchanges. He would have proposed, "I'll comply without resistance, I'll comply ahead of time, but grant me a final bonus of $4.3 million and lifelong privileges of traveling in First Class at no cost."

When Vanessa Hudson arrives at her desk on Wednesday morning, she will be faced with an enormous sick bag that is filled to the brim. The distinct smell of parmesan cheese from Joyce will linger throughout the Qantas main office, making its way into the nostrils of all the passengers seated on the worn-out, old 737 planes. Meanwhile, Uncle Rich will be continuously moving back and forth along the airplane aisles, spreading his humble fragrance.

Goyder was chosen again at Qantas' yearly meeting in the past year, at a time when only a small fraction of the company's awful behavior had been exposed. Nevertheless, he is now determined that shareholders require his presence to lead the airline's efforts of improving its brand. If he possessed any courage whatsoever, he would willingly present himself as a candidate for election at the AGM on November 3rd.

He had the option to take responsibility for his actions and take ownership of his choices – Joyce's sudden departure was not one of them! Uncle Rich could justify his typical stance, which is to avoid making any decisions. While he may be promoting modesty, he's not showing any remorse, as he evidently lacks it.

Throughout all these years toiling alongside Alan Joyce, the gentleman with the bewitching eyeglasses, it appears that Uncle Rich has been bestowed with a vibrant creativity of his own. Presently, he stands alone in Australia, perceiving himself as a contributor to resolving issues rather than being a contributor to them.

Customers, regulators, and prominent investors might consider erecting a large advertisement in Mosman Park inquiring about the whereabouts of this individual. However, it is highly unlikely that such an action would have any notable impact.